My journey into writing, had started long ago, but they were not available publicly. My introduction to writing happened in 2017 when I attended Melbourne Writers Festival, where I randomly selected events.
Two key talks I listened to were:
- Writing Family History
- Fact to Fiction
Writing Family History, after listening to the talk, I understood that I must consider all sorts of legalities, privacy, and family breakups. I learnt that I had to choose very carefully what I write.
Lesson (On the day of talk and retrospectively): All my writings to be my personal experiences, which are equally my experiences as much as other’s. I had to ensure, what ever is virtuously held high as “family secrets”, unless my own secret, shouldn’t be shared. Even my own secrets, if involves family, I had to carefully analyse, observe, recognise the damage it can cause, and only stick to very high level overview. This to me sounded like hell on earth. I’m sure we who has some family knows why. However, I also knew, key information that delivers a message, cannot be withheld, and cannot take out of context. Taking something out of context is a drama we have lived through and suffered in multitude of disputes including war. Hence, key messages either need to be fully disclosed, or summarised in a succinct way, as the findings, without the story.
Writing Fact as Fiction appealed to me, as what the talk talked about was how one can create a fiction, based on facts, and by slightly adjusting by adding a bit of fiction. This dialutes the story without taking the message out. No one can find what is a fact or fiction within the story. This appealed as the easy way out.
Lesson (On the day of talk, and retrospectively): I was struggling to imagine fiction. Since the workshop, even 4 months later, I couldn’t fully get to fictionise anything. Writing Fiction is an art, and concept of having to study it would bore me to death and I will loose interest. This also meant everything I’ve that far written in books or letters or notes had to be rewritten, and fictionising such a task felt like it would take eternity. I knew my time is limited (just like for all of us)
The task at hand vs writing type was a complex decision in my mind. So the idea was parked. During the same time some things happened that indicated someone was already writing my story. But when I was in Sri Lanka the same year, I felt that could be just my imagination. So I had to take matters to my own hands as the knowing I had was not a joke, it cannot be withheld. I decided even if it is a blog at a time, I write so that if I die, at least what I wrote can be later looked at by someone.
So, I started to chuck my notes as blog posts on 31st December 2017 or just before that. It had no style, no particular aim, just throwing everything into cloud data platform that is publicly available. I was afraid Lukas would be mad at me, but by that time his existence was a question, as he had stopped communicating with me. Having no one to ask permission, and knowing I will not use his full name, and knowing he has no social media presence to back track, I used his name unapologetically. I was hoping I’d be forgiven, considering the love he showed me in the 8 weeks we lived together, and the 2 years we communicated distantly.
This I Promise You: My purpose is not to insult family, friends, or upset any group of individuals who hold a different view. If my inside information, my sexuality, my relationships, my race, my truth about my experiences (what I did during living life), offends someone or is taken as an insult to family, friends, or a group of individuals, I request you to consider reading my entire blog posts from beginning till end, to see if you yourself would consider family, friendship, or virtuousness of views, over a united peaceful earth mission.
I promise you I chose, and will continue to choose the mission over any relationship I have had as family, friendship, or the race or religion I was born to. I work for God and Universal Consciousness, and I have thus far earned my bread and butter by doing my day job in Information Technology. This I hope no one see as a crime.
I will also promise, my mission is about a path to freedom, and creating a heavenly place on earth where people living in United Freedom understood from within, and not about bringing out family or friendship matters.
However, each family member, friend, or someone unknown to me, can use their personal information, and walk down the path shown to taste the freedom.
They don’t have to publicly talk about it as I do.
– Nim –